At the same time that you’re discussing finances with your respective families, you and your fiancé need to have a heart-to-heart talk about your money situation. Why? So you can figure out how much you can afford to spend on your wedding. Take an honest look at your spending patterns, debt, and expenses, and see how much money you can realistically set aside in time for your wedding.

If you come up with a small number—and no help from your respective parents you’ll have a few options. One, you can look at that guest list you put together in and cut it down to a more manageable size. Two, you can figure out a way to have everyone at your wedding but to cut your overall wedding costs. Three, you can consider alternative funding options, such as taking out a home equity loan to pay for your wedding (see “Using Loans to Help Pay for the Wedding,” later in this chapter).

Or, four, you could reshuffle your expectations of a wedding during a popular month (anytime between May and October) and plan to get married during the more affordable off-season (see “Choosing a Time, Day, and Month That Can Save You Money,” later in this chapter). If you come up with a sizeable amount of money, you know that you’ll have the freedom to be a bit more extravagant with your planning, such as arranging for more food, extra flowers, or a bigger band. Or with more money to work with, you can become that June bride that you’ve alwaysdreamed of being.